Due to the fact that apparently it's a copyright no-no as of now, but not at the time, Conanco, Mr. Obrien and his lawyers have asked that the video of him and Jack White shredding on national television be taken down and discarded from my blog. So I have complied because at my meager wages, it would have been the year 2196 before I would have been able to pay the fine that was to be imposed. That wasn't even counting that they were writing into the legal paper work that I would be responsible for catering in all Vienna sausages whenever Kirstie Alley was a guest on the show.
Thank you all for your continued support in my absence, but when I return you can expect I'll be doing a killer rendition of 'Video Killed the Radio Star' with Jack White on lead guitar!
Hey, in all my awesomeness I've been away awhile but I haven't forgot about all of you, and my fans either. In truth, I've been off a little, but have tried to keep up with you all in my absence by checking in on Facebook, beaten up by my favorite new bullies over at Blog This, found funny in others blogs and oh, I've taken it upon myself to write a complete novel in the month of November.
Thanks, NaNoWriMo...5:30 in the morning thinks you suck ass through a straw.
But truth is so far it's been good to me. I don't know how other aspiring authors do it, but I tend to sidetracked by stuff like the intensely intriguing way that cobwebs grow in the corner of our apartment over a course of several weeks. When I do lose my focus I walk away sometimes as long as the entire last decade of the last millennium. NaNoWriMo, if nothing else has got me to write consistently for about nine days, some 21,000+ words, just over a hundred pages and a lot of crap, a toilet bowl consisting of last night vomit after one two many shots of character development and a colostomy bag full of shitty plot ideas. It's taken me from sanity (an objective state that some would argue with me about) to bat shit crazy!
But, while it hasn't all been great, some good writing has come from it, but that wasn't my objective. The goal, for me, wasn't to write the best novel I could, but to get what I consider a extensive outline, a first rough draft and most of all, a finish. I'm well on my way.
*CROWD GOES WILD*
Before working in conjunction with NaNoWriMo, I'd actually spent the better part of six months working on this crazy, satirical political thriller that may or may not start on one side of the country and more than likely will ending somewhere else, the main character might have some sort of droopy lisp or a pompadour...who knows? What I do know for sure is that at this point it is basically a hodge-podge of me not knowing what the fuck I'm writing about.
Last night, though, the world evened it's plain out just a little, the wobbly axis straightened itself out some. A reprieve for me, much needed and a long time a comin'. So, finally, after a very long wait, a mammoth size tour, a Twitter push unequal to anything ever seen before!
So without further ado, and as if the man needs anymore publicity, here he is, Conan O'Brien, the funniest