Thursday, July 1, 2010

Pamela Gorman - gun packin', tea baggin', bunny killin', crazy ass whack job!

I was reminded of Quentin Tarantino recently.

I'm a fan, and maybe one of the most cutting edge directors of our times.  'Pulp Fiction' is probably my favorite of all time, not just Tarantinos films, but of all films.  So many great scenes and a completely perfectly laid out plot line.

Plus...Uma.  Here, let me just show you.

Need I say more?

Not enough praise can be doused on this first attempt at commercial movie making, that being 'Reservoir Dogs'.  Steve Buschemi as Mr. Pink and his speech on why he doesn't 'tip' was classic and should have been the first Oscar associated with a Quentin Tarantino film.

Ah and the fourty-seven total and combined minutes of 'Kill Bill 1and 2' were worthy of my complete attention (the other three days of film footage could have been trimmed down).  Of course, it's best that Q left the Uma parts edited in.

Again...take a looksy, just to your left.  Don't know about you, but I can't get enough.

But let's not forget his most recent, 'Inglourious Basterds'.  Wins an Oscar for Best Pic and reinforces that only Tarantino could make a WWII flick that's thought provoking and funny while wanting to make you want to upchuck the popcorn sitting in your lap.  Take scene where Brad Pitts character Lt. Aldo Raine is giving Sgt. Werner Rachtman of Nazi forces two choices...give up the location of his fellow German troops or meet the Bear Jew, a club carrying, Nazi skull bashing member of the Basterds.  Great stuff. By far his best since 'Pulp Fiction'.

Love QT.

But the guy doesn't always make a great movie.  Take his Grindhouse films, 'Planet Terror' and 'Death Proof'.  Entertaining, but hardly for the weak of stomach nor most of half the Earths population.  You definitely had to be a fan to appreciate.

But, my opinion is that his most average film and the reason I was reminded of Quentin Tarantino, is  'Jackie Brown'.  Got a lot of attention at the time, but it did follow 'Pulp Fiction', so there was quite a bit of anticipation.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I really liked this film.  It was based on a novel of a favorite author of mine, Elmore Leonard.  It moved along quickly, had violence, humor, Bridget Fonda looking as hippie as a Fonda can, and once again Q reinvented another lost actor, actually two, that being Robert Forster and Pam Grier.  But, to the rest of the world it didn't stack up as great, just average.

Okay, so recently I was skipping news channels during the most partisan part of the day, and ran across a television ad for a congressional candidate from Arizona that I couldn't get enough of.  Made me laugh til I almost shat myself, but more importantly, I had to dig through my DVD's to find my copy of 'Jackie Brown' because the similarities were eerily similar between cinematic fiction and political fiction.

Remember the scene where Ordell Robbie (Samuel Jackson), a gun runner high on the take down list of the ATF, is showing his former cellmate and all around dim witted criminal buddy Louie Gara (Robert De Niro) an ad for fully automatic guns.  The 'ratatatatatata tat' sound of the gun fire was nearly as cool as the bikini clad ladies shooting em off.   These beauties, every time they squeezed off a clip - ratatatatatatat tat! - they would jiggle and shake, little beads of sexy sweat dripping from their flaming muzzles.

Woooooo boy!

And just like Pamela Gorman, but....well not really.  I mean really, I did think of those bouncing NRA card carrying sluts but truly, the only thing jiggling on Pam is her mouth.

For God sake!  Is it an commercial ad for candidate Pamela Gorman blasting away at (imaginary?) Jihadists that are nonchalantly walking across the border and using her own personal swimming pool for a refreshing dip while collecting their evil thoughts?!  Or possibly Pamela's blasting a bunny nibbling on her lettuce garden?  Just imagine if Thumper goes all rabid and starts having terrorist ideas of blowing up some dry patch of cactus and putting anthrax in the water supply.  Who would you want there by your side taking down these heathen furry scumbag terrorists?

Pam 'Rambo' Gorman, that's who.

What a woman!  Just the kind of representative I'd want making law for me if I were an Arizonian.

Just think.  If Quentin had accepted her audition tape for the part as automatic weapon carrying, stipped to her A cups, Arizona may not have this November to look forward to laugh her right back to her vegetable garden.

'ratatatatatatata tat'


  1. I wish you replaced any of the Siskel and Ebert guys. Pulp Fiction is a most definite on my top 10. And Inglorious was awesome, beyond awesome. I'm sure those 2 nose sniveling guys gave Pulp Fiction 2 thumbs down. The movie is 3-4 stories in one. A true classic and a true editing piece of class art. I know nothing of your Arizona Gorman politician, but... who cares. You mentioned some movies I love (ditto on Kill Bill, only problem is, Uma's got the ugliest feet I've ever seen, not to be catty but...) so I'm giving you 2 thumbs up.

  2. I have to ask, did you see Grindhouse in the theater, or on DVD? I ask because that flick was really a made for theater only. A double feature like they had 'em in the old days. Complete with fake trailers of even worse movies, and ads for such things as the Mexican restaurant next door complete with pictures of plates of food with no audio at all. Hilarious. And the conversation between the stunt girls in the cafe. It was so long and off of any subject related to the movie that I started thinking someone put a little extra "something" in my coke. Absolute genius. but like I said, it had to be seen on the big screen to be properly appreciated as the tribute to small independent places, including the drive ins that showed this kind of stuff for real. I can still remember seeing "Empire of the Ants" and "Food of the Gods", an awesome double feature of giant bugs taking over the world. A piece of American history I truly miss.