Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Electronic Mayhem

There are times that I can't live without my electronics.  And there are a slew of 'em. 

First and foremost, my BLackberry, or as I call it, my Crackberry.  The damn thing is more addictive than crack after all.  Weirdly enough, I can't tell you the exact moment it happened, but it's become a permanent fixture to my body.  Like the prawn hand on that guy that got goo'd on in the movie District 9.  If I'm not texting, then you can find me Googling strange south African musical instruments or the reason monkeys throw poop. 

My Blackberry is awful handy when I'm wanting to send off a smartass Facebook post or find out who is following me, which that leads me to an idea that I have for an application on FB.  I call it Why in the hell would you wanna follow Ron??? 

I also Twitter.  Ugh...I said it. Swore I'd never Tweet, but in all actuality  there are three things I swore that I would never do. 

1. Get a perm,  check. 
2. Watch the Twilight gayfest, check. 
3. And Twitter. 

Two out of three ain't bad I guess.

And when it comes to my Blackberry, do not even get me started on Brickbreaker!

Then I have my laptop that I'm constantly writing this or that on, whether it's my blog or stories or the novel I've been working on since the Clinton administration.  Back then there was no such thing as dual Pentium processor, just my trusty Intel i486 with a background on the monitor of Uma Thurman, pre-Pulp Fiction.  ( I would love to give that woman a shot of adrenaline!)

I have a Creative Arts Zen mp3 player.  I've had my 30 gigs of musical storage box heaven for about five years.  I refuse to buy into the Ipod phenomenon.  Not that I have a problem with the Apple product.  I just think Zen sounds cooler than Ipod. 

Ayooooo....Zzzzennnnnn....Ayoooo....Zzzzennnnnn....Kinda relaxing when listening to the White Stripes, even at ear bleeding decibel levels.
Don't forget the t.v., dvd player, surround sound stereo, robotic vacuum cleaner, mixing bowl and my girlfriends pleasure toys err...curling iron.  Lots and lots of gadgets.

Right now, one of my other favorite devices is my Sony Reader, a birthday gift I was pleasantly surprised to receive. It's a book with buttons rather than pages.  It consists of electrodes, pixels, liquid levels and other friggin cool stuff rather than ink.  I'm constantly reading and with my Reader I have stored some twenty-five or thirty books that I've downloaded and am either reading, about to read or have read.  There are a lot of 'Libraries' to download off of....Barnes and Noble, Reader Library, Smashword, etc., with millions of books, newspapers and other publications that are easily accessible.  The only down side to the Reader is that if you were to opt to censor a book for being trash and not appropriate for the kids, like Going Rogue by Sarah Palin's ghost writer, then it wouldn't be financially sound idea to toss the Reader into the large burning bonfire.  Other than that it's very cool!

The funny thing about electronics is that this all came about today when I experienced a surreal moment.  I had been writing on my laptop when I realized not only was the computer humming, but I had ESPN on the tube, I was listening to Bob Dylan through my headphones, was texting my girlfriend who was at work dealing with bratty kids and I had been trying to think up a clever post I could put up on Twitter about how much easier life was as a kid when I thought all things could be made better just by a giant pitcher of grape Kool-Aid crashing through the walls of my kitchen.

Seems like overkill, but at this point in my life I'm pretty dependent on all things of the electronic persuasion, and not so sure I could give up my electronic fix without some sort of support group.

Anyway, I got to run, people. My phone's vibrating.


  1. you arent suppose to tell people about my 'gadgets' ..... Lmao!!!!!

  2. Uh...I'm not sure why that's laugh out loud hysterical...